Why do so many people, in all areas of the business world, habitually function far below their capabilities? Why is it that employees who receive significant raises often become incompetent in performing the same tasks for which they were rewarded? It's a well-documented fact that many executives as well as their employees often react negatively to an unusual success by developing self-defeating habit patterns that undermine their achievements.

A common thread running through these examples points to an important truth about human behavior: We all exist in a state of conflict between what we would like to achieve and what we allow ourselves to accomplish.

All of us have strong desires to find satisfaction and fulfillment in all aspects of life (note that these tendencies are part of the "real self”). At the same time, we have tendencies to sabotage our successes and limit our achievements (these tendencies are manifestations of our critical inner voice). Moving forward with a strong desire along with a strong inner critic can be very hard.  It is like trying to drive a car with one foot on the gas and the other on the breaks.  Not only we wouldn’t go very far, we will likely end up damaging the car as well.

Without an awareness of the malicious attitudes toward ourselves and others that are part of our critical inner voice, we may act in ways that are against our own best interests. And to the extent to which our behaviors are controlled by this negative point of view determines the state of mind we exist in while at work or in our studies.  

How the Inner Critic (the source of these judgments towards yourself as well as about others) interferes with your success at work (or in your studies) is one of the topics in the upcoming teleclass: Free Yourself from Your Inner Critic (using E.F.T.).  Click here for more details

Wanting to Be Taken Care of
An example of how the Inner Critic can interfere with your success at work is when it undermines your self confidence and trust in your capabilities, which can lead to your depending on your coworkers or the boss for support, approval, and care, and that in turns interfere with your work success.

To the degree that we want to be "taken care of," we will experience thoughts that go along with this attitude. We will tend to be concerned about getting approval and will rely on other people's opinions rather than developing our own. We may tell ourselves, "Your boss is the one making the decisions. After all, he's the expert. Who do you think you are to set policy? Just figure out what you're supposed to do and do it!"

This tendency had been observed in people working at the management level as well. Most people in authority are reluctant to reveal any feelings of dependency and insecurity. They tend to deceive themselves and rationalize their demands to be taken care of by such thoughts as: "You've delegated that job, now they should take care of it without any more direction from you." The underlying meaning is: "They should take care of you, that’s their job."

You can see how people's ability to function in a mature, responsible manner at work would be seriously compromised by these kinds of rationalizations, which are promoted by the inner voice. The goal for employees and managers alike is to give up dependent behaviors, move toward independence, and ultimately learn how to be interdependent—that is, to work in harmony with others rather than depending on them for approval or support.

Want to learn more?
Want to know more about the topic and learn some strategies to help you deal with your Inner Critic?  Join us for the upcoming teleclass:   Free Yourself from Your Inner Critic (using E.F.T.).  

It is a 7-week teleclass starting on Saturday, April 23rd.  Click here to register.

Enjoy In Joy

Ahmad